Laurus (laurus_nobilis) wrote in insert_phrase,

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Phrase #45 - "The Classics"

Title: The Classics
Fandom: XXXHOLiC
Characters: Clow and Yuuko
Phrase: #45. I won't hurt you, unless you want me to.
Warnings/Ratings: PG-13
Synopsis: “Fine. If you want it to be porn, then it's porn. Can I have it back now, please?”
Author's notes: No, the fic isn't porn. :P


The Classics

Nothing in the world, Clow thought, was as relaxing as spending some time in an old library. The smell of ancient books, the texture of their pages, their yellowing colour... everything about them was perfect. He could stay like that for hours, entranced. It was so enthralling that he didn't even notice that Yuuko had entered the room until she spoke to him.

Are you going to take much longer?” she asked.

He looked at her over his shoulder, without standing up from his chair. She stood on the doorway with her arms crossed, obviously bored.

I'll be there in a minute,” he promised. That didn't seem to convince her.

You said that half an hour ago,” she replied. As she walked towards him, she looked with varying degrees of interest at the piles of books that lay on the desk and all over the carpet. “And you also said that you were only going to look for a particular spell so we could go on working. What's all this?”

Ah... well, yes, you've caught me,” he said, with a sheepish grin. “I was looking for it. Then I got, um, a little distracted.”

I can tell,” Yuuko muttered, still staring at the mess he'd made; but then her face lit up. “Oooh. Look at this!”

She picked up a large and very old book with leather covers. Clow smiled to himself when he recognized it.

Beautiful, isn't it?” he asked. “I bought that one in Florence, long ago. Even back then it was an antique. It cost me a fortune.”

Clow,” she said, her eyes shining. “Don't you realize what this is?”

He was tempted to make a scathing reply telling her that he did, in fact, know what he kept in his own library, but he bit it back. Instead, he contented himself with raising his eyebrows at her and pushing up his glasses with his best intellectual look.

That would be an incunabulum, printed before 1501,” he said. “It's Boccaccio's Decameron, one of the most important pieces of literature from the early Italian Renaissance.”

No, apart from that,” she told him, waving one of her hands. “It's basically porn.”

This time, Clow couldn't help rolling his eyes at her.

Not really, no. There are many kinds of stories in it,” he explained. “Which you would know if you had ever bothered to read it.”

But Yuuko didn't seem to care about being accurate. She just laughed at him and pressed the book against her chest, still grinning madly.

I~found~your~porn!” she sang, and then she stood on tiptoe and twirled.

Clow winced at the sight. For a split second, he was about to stand up and retrieve the object; but the thought of his friend making sudden movements while she carried his precious book dissuaded him. It was too great a risk. He decided to stay where he was and try to reason with her, as difficult as that seemed at the moment.

You're behaving like a twelve-year-old,” he said. “Put that down.”

Why?” she asked, giving him a sly look. “Are you afraid that I'm going to steal your porn?”

I'm afraid because you're playing with a book that is almost as old as I am and worth more than this whole town,” he answered. “Please, Yuuko. Give it back.”

Ask nicely!” she demanded. She was still laughing, and she twirled farther away from him as she spoke. Clow sighed.

I just did,” he told her. “What else do you want me to – no, don't answer that.”

But that had already caught her attention. Yuuko stopped in her track and stared at him for a moment. Then she smiled dangerously. She walked back towards his chair, slow and sensual, like a cat. Once she was close enough, she leaned down and put one finger under his chin, lifting his face so he would look into her eyes.

Now, now, dear. You don't need to be so scared of me,” she drawled. “I won't hurt you, unless you want me to.”

Clow gave her a bored look.

That line is even older than the book.”

Aww. Can't take a joke?” she teased him.

Incunabula are nothing to joke about,” he said. “And I cannot begin to explain how much you would owe me if you so much as bent one of its pages.”

Oh, don't worry!” she told him. “We can get you plenty of porn to make up for it!”

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and reminded himself that hexing into next week would harm the book.

All right,” he said at last, defeated. “What do you want?”

It's porn. Admit it,” Yuuko ordered. He shrugged.

That's it?” he said. “Fine. If you want it to be porn, then it's porn. Can I have it back now, please?”

You're no fun,” she muttered, looking disappointed, when he took the book from her hands. “You were supposed to be at least a bit embarrassed.”

Clow blinked. And then he couldn't help but laugh.

What? You truly thought that was the problem?” he asked. “I was only nervous because I didn't want you to harm the book, Yuuko.”

Yes, I can see that,” she replied, suddenly grinning again. “You're petting it.”

I'm – I'm dusting it off,” he corrected; but he could feel the heat that filled his cheeks.

Lovingly dusting it off!” she laughed. “Oh dear, this is so much better than what I expected!”


I made you blush!” she told him. Clow narrowed his eyes.

And that,” he said, “is why books are better than people.”

Yuuko sighed, shaking her head at him.

And that explains so much about you,” she chuckled, and ruffled his hair.

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